Episode 17: Ghost Hunters/Transcript
00:00 ::there's no place to escape this is the 00:03 ::law started by our that is sing about an 00:25 ::ammonite name alright well that's the 00:27 ::most horrific thing this podcast has 00:29 ::ever been a part of welcome to last 00:31 ::podcast on the left with Marcus Parks 00:33 ::I'm Ben Kissel with us as always the 00:35 ::scientist the mastermind who is that 00:37 ::beast creature of reynold wacky 00:40 ::Templeton yeah Kimmel one-liners you 00:43 ::faggot 00:44 ::well he's obviously an old-time he's 00:46 ::sold from the past absolutely my name is 00:49 ::Henry Zebrowski in case you forget it 00:51 ::just write it down Henry Zebrowski Zeb 00:55 ::our OS wrong w you're wrong hey K zip 00:59 ::rouse ki Zebrowski sounds complicated 01:01 ::because it's polish but it is not 01:03 ::remotely complicated and you have a 01:05 ::problem ironically it's complicated if 01:08 ::you're polish all right today we're 01:10 ::talking about it well my grandfather did 01:12 ::lose the recipe for making ice sigh 01:16 ::seriously I got you I make this ice but 01:21 ::all I got is this I water I just keep 01:24 ::trying to kill myself but I don't have 01:25 ::enough money for bullets well hey give 01:27 ::it a shot yeah I would say go with a 01:29 ::hanging either way you do it you can 01:33 ::always come back as a ghost here's 01:34 ::gravity it's got the bullet that's a 01:36 ::good point as a matter of fact grab with 01:38 ::God Lourdes 01:39 ::what's the Lord's us you know screaming 01:42 ::a locomotive it's you it's a snake 01:44 ::when you jump right out of those towers 01:46 ::makes are scary just like a train these 01:48 ::are the things I think about every 01:51 ::single day ladies and gentlemen 01:53 ::I'm gonna tell you that is the mind of 01:56 ::an actor right there holy Lord 01:58 ::oh do I have to turn this AC off I 02:00 ::believe you'd is it coming in can you 02:02 ::hear that eh so today everybody's 02:04 ::actually I've been what am I getting is 02:05 ::that's not yeah okay Danis don't come in 02:09 ::ah ladies and gentlemen we've just been 02:11 ::haunted and that's what we're talking 02:13 ::about today and how Henry came over to 02:16 ::WoW the place of my employment today 02:17 ::what a nice little place to be there 02:19 ::with Ben and his dogs and Ben just had 02:22 ::such a sweet smile on his face 02:23 ::those dogs old and mean they're sweet 02:26 ::wonderful puppies and I loved every inch 02:28 ::of them which is only about 7 inches 02:30 ::they're very tiny small dogs 02:32 ::God knows they're about the size of a 02:34 ::Polish man's wonderful wonderful face so 02:38 ::we have a sure yes the Lincoln polish 02:41 ::buddy that's fine oh absolutely I get it 02:43 ::yeah sure why why is the length it 02:46 ::doesn't yeah I get actually in fact been 02:48 ::me and you one day took one of these 02:49 ::dogs into the Halloween store to shop 02:51 ::for ghoulish things that's right that's 02:54 ::exactly what we did and I love doing it 02:56 ::with you I love doing it with you and we 02:58 ::had a great time we did uh so yes so 03:01 ::Henry came over and we got to watch the 03:03 ::cable and we were discussing what these 03:05 ::shows were all these ghost hunter shows 03:07 ::so we decided to give a look-see to a 03:09 ::few of them 03:10 ::we watched yeah we watched a couple of 03:12 ::ghost lab we watched Ghost Adventures in 03:14 ::watch Paranormal State and they're the 03:17 ::top five ghost hunting shows are those 03:20 ::are in the top three and then there's 03:21 ::most haunted which is pretty fun and 03:23 ::ghost hunters and I will say ghost lab 03:26 ::this is fascinating this is a bunch of I 03:28 ::don't know where they're from but 03:29 ::they're all fat yeah they're hairy men 03:31 ::they're all fat and there's a there's a 03:34 ::bus that sits outside which I get in the 03:36 ::lab dumbest fucking convention for a 03:39 ::show they show up in an 18-wheeler lab 03:42 ::they go when they yell at the ghosts in 03:45 ::your house and then talk about science 03:47 ::like oh but we're using science we're 03:49 ::using science gg's there it's it's 03:52 ::nice-looking nonsense they look like 03:55 ::they went to a mail-order school for 03:58 ::whatever is they're doing first on cuz 04:00 ::you got to know something about science 04:01 ::you gotta know something out physics 04:02 ::you're just doing like parlor tricks and 04:05 ::just yelling at ghosts this is the thing 04:07 ::that annoyed me about the program others 04:09 ::are worse than others but the ghost lab 04:11 ::I feel like they're the Dickie Dickie 04:13 ::estudia ghosts they went to a family's 04:16 ::house and 4 to the 5 in this family had 04:19 ::shot themselves in the face why and then 04:21 ::one and it was all predicated upon one 04:24 ::of the younger sons um just dying right 04:27 ::he just died yeah and so he decided what 04:29 ::sickness no stamp sickness on him when 04:32 ::he showed the fig tree he died it dies 04:34 ::on the show he doubted the consumption 04:36 ::yes the group yes yeah you never know 04:39 ::it's scavengers love that old disease 04:42 ::had people used to have you get a bad 04:44 ::buy yeah absolutely scarlet fever it's 04:47 ::cause from the dust of opening up old 04:49 ::unused coffins or looking for old books 04:51 ::yeah if there was very similar but the 04:54 ::two of the poor victims of 9/11 are 04:56 ::going through right now yes God knows 04:57 ::that jesus fucking christ god bless them 05:00 ::i think we had it we had the moment 05:03 ::speaking of hard to get a haunted 05:05 ::grounds i don't know if they should be 05:06 ::building that new world trade so why 05:08 ::don't we offer the old osa bankers 05:11 ::everywhere buys how do you have the 05:18 ::report from last corner beside my bow 05:21 ::Greg but I'm gonna put in your inbox I 05:26 ::mean it might work out perfectly you 05:27 ::come into your office all the documents 05:29 ::are stamped a janitor comes in the 05:31 ::floors are already mopped and perfectly 05:33 ::clean absolutely haunting well I can't 05:36 ::wait is for the old businessmen who died 05:37 ::there naturally their ghosts in mix with 05:39 ::the new ones that died there horribly we 05:41 ::got a guys with big cellphone ghosts and 05:44 ::then you've got a bunch of people with 05:45 ::like monitoring phones yeah like 05:47 ::everybody wants to rule though letting 05:51 ::you guys you listen to fucking 05:53 ::Nickelback it's gonna be a whole mix 05:55 ::them up yeah that's right but ghosts mix 05:57 ::them up they're all going to get 05:58 ::together over Dennis Miller's Weekend 06:00 ::Update because that was the beautiful 06:03 ::leading but nonetheless this what I was 06:05 ::thinking too all these ghosts they say 06:07 ::that suicides and early deaths like a 06:10 ::murder situation give you a meek you a 06:12 ::ghost and I was thinking maybe you're 06:14 ::just a ghost on earth until you're 06:16 ::naturally supposed to die so if you get 06:18 ::shot or if you kill yourself you might 06:20 ::have 40 years to be a ghost might have 06:21 30 years to be a ghost maybe until your 06:23 ::spirits interesting to be going onto the 06:25 ::other side you have to stay here as a 06:27 ::you know a shitty penance or you know 06:29 ::you get to move why 06:31 ::glasses which is all these ghosts seem 06:32 ::to do dance and that was in good 06:34 ::Paranormal State we'll get to how 06:35 ::fucking stupid Santa can we get plastic 06:38 ::with ghost lab for a second douchiest of 06:40 ::all of them ghost lab is just they have 06:43 ::a lot of graphics they have a lot of 06:45 ::like lots of them like it's um-- ghost 06:47 ::facts yeah i mean so like you go slam 06:50 ::with you and then it just like shows lab 06:54 ::results like zoom sees you mean you're 06:58 ::like like they look like metal rods it's 07:00 ::so fucking stupid but the thing is the 07:02 ::one thing so they're the one thing that 07:05 ::employees of this hotel that's now a 07:07 ::hotel used to be a family home they all 07:09 ::keep saying that they all seen this good 07:10 ::this dog ghost i want our sons one of 07:14 ::the sons shot the dog and then shot 07:16 ::himself one of the people come in to 07:18 ::suicide there and so the key everyone 07:19 ::you're like and then sometimes it not 07:22 ::you can feel the dog just brushing up 07:24 ::against your leg so just look at here 07:26 ::barking so but they yeah they mike the 07:29 ::whole thing for sound and it's just like 07:31 ::one of those were they like you're 07:34 ::noting things like hey man you hear that 07:36 ::hear that are her look kill you yeah 07:39 ::he's like no man no he's like you didn't 07:42 ::hear that you didn't hear the d yeah 07:44 ::yeah yeah like no i didn't know i didn't 07:47 ::hear that we better check the tape it 07:48 ::seems to geez this is a soundscape go 07:51 ::soundscape and then it cuts to like the 07:54 ::the fucking sound effect thing and then 07:55 ::it's just like dare it is right there 07:57 ::near it is you hear it you're the dog 08:03 ::walker the dog bark was real the dog 08:07 ::bark voice that they heard was real but 08:09 ::they failed to mention the hotel is next 08:11 ::to a highway that has a large side it 08:13 ::was a living dog dog depart outside and 08:16 ::so images the dog in the lab in the in 08:20 ::the in this ghost lab of theirs AKA my 08:22 ::trailer where they probably all live 08:24 ::drama look like a set it's not even it's 08:27 ::not a lab labs are not put in the back 08:29 ::obviously doesn't have wet labs are put 08:32 ::in the back of trucks yes it obviously 08:34 ::doesn't have like one like entire wall 08:36 ::that's how they film it's very pathetic 08:38 ::so they'll bill here like uh like they 08:41 ::were they were doing this thing with the 08:42 ::wine glasses evidently ghosts love to 08:44 ::just 08:44 ::to shake my eyes to the smalls that's 08:46 ::later on that's the other show no sperm 08:49 ::okay know that this happened the same 08:51 ::thing and so the ghost the the thing 08:53 ::like rattles a little bit and they're 08:54 ::like did you hear that yeah that's right 08:56 ::that's right the decorations they who do 08:58 ::the vibrations of the glass and the 08:59 ::chick the chick comes through like it's 09:01 ::some stupid Lethal Weapon film and she 09:03 ::says uh yeah just a large semi truck 09:05 ::just drove by so it's like a semi truck 09:08 ::that drove by it's like it doesn't make 09:10 ::any sense whatsoever and it's so 09:11 ::upsetting to actual like ghosts it's 09:14 ::just these fatties walk around the house 09:15 ::going like oh so you killed yourself 09:17 ::ghosts look what you show me show me 09:20 ::that you're realized you killed your dog 09:23 ::you think you're so big you think you're 09:24 ::so tough and it's like man and they're 09:26 ::literally trying to break these ghosts 09:29 ::like a bully tries to break in eighth 09:31 ::grade and it pops up the image of the 09:33 ::bottom all the text shoots it it's like 09:34 ::provocation tests and he's just like 09:36 ::we're like giving a ghost face and make 09:39 ::that ghost stand up like a man and show 09:42 ::us if he exists and we're just I was 09:44 ::like I fucking swear fuse to believe 09:48 ::that a ghost is affected by pride number 09:52 ::one you're gonna bully a ghost to do 09:54 ::anything the idea bullying ago just 09:56 ::shows you the depth of their minds their 09:58 ::how do you get a reaction out of 09:59 ::somebody call me yeah give me a cheese 10:02 ::honey it's like I have I will get you 10:04 ::cheese darling oh yeah oh so sounds like 10:07 ::to me I don't know about you Dave of 10:09 ::ghost labs how you feeling but it feels 10:11 ::like this goes here you some kind of 10:13 ::pussy I was gonna say faggot but you 10:16 ::went pussy yeah man you're right I was 10:19 ::wrong 10:19 ::he is a faggy pussy Fagin why are you 10:22 ::still on it goes 10:23 ::come on you fucking fag ghost this is 10:26 ::what you want play football you want 10:28 ::football with some bad game at home 10:30 ::throwing the football at the wall really 10:31 ::catch it give it all can't you be a man 10:33 ::it's you an aunt ghost I just don't 10:36 ::understand how this exists and these 10:39 ::assholes and they make day how much 10:40 ::money do they make per episode now and 10:42 ::also where are your credentials how 10:45 ::would they ever pass were they wedding 10:47 ::busted ghosts have they ever stopped a 10:49 ::ghost if they ever proved that ghost 10:51 ::exists in their traveling go slap 10:54 ::once not yet not yet but they will 10:56 ::absolutely it will be paying them to 10:59 ::bring them back peeking of people who 11:01 ::pretend as if they've actually seen a 11:02 ::ghost which I think this might be true 11:04 ::this guy's this is me the douchiest in 11:06 ::our opinion this one's called Ghost 11:08 ::Adventures 11:09 ::this guy is just like no I didn't 11:12 ::believe I grew up not believing in 11:14 ::ghosts until one day I saw a ghost 11:17 ::yeah now I go on Ghost Adventures to 11:21 ::recreate what I saw and it's like if 11:23 ::Yahoo grows up not believing in ghosts 11:25 ::yeah it's still fucking Stooges stew but 11:28 ::I will say this the irony of it all is 11:30 ::if he did not believe in ghosts that's 11:31 ::why the ghost showed himself because the 11:34 ::ghost was just like oh there's a prime 11:35 ::victim it's like women who were out 11:36 ::there clutching their purses with a 11:38 ::shank in their hands they're ready to 11:40 ::not to get raped yeah you know they're 11:41 ::prepared not to get scared by a governor 11:43 ::chick deadly diddlin out there in 11:45 ::Williamsburg with a low-cut dress on be 11:47 ::like everything safe here in Brooklyn 11:48 ::what else are victims well she's you 11:50 ::wearing she's wearing a low-cut blouse 11:52 ::yeah in a nice located shirt you've got 11:54 ::the you get the UH like what do you call 11:56 ::those nice horses yeah they're fake 11:58 ::they're fake glasses yeah I'm sure glad 12:00 ::how tight is distress yeah it's well 12:03 ::it's not that tight because would you 12:04 ::believe that the bloomie is kind of 12:05 ::coming back oh really 12:06 ::yeah it also makes it for easier access 12:08 ::your legs like yeah they're long white 12:11 ::very skinny on your skin you can see 12:13 ::enjoyment are they milky uh-huh very 12:16 ::milky very pathetically milky fresh out 12:18 ::of fresh at a theater school got good 12:20 ::feet like will her feet open-toed shoes 12:22 ::her toes are fine well done uh-huh 12:25 ::uh-huh what about the hair what's her 12:27 ::hair the hair is a little bit shorter 12:28 ::it's a little bit cutting a bob and 12:30 ::she's got a bandana on yeah yeah no see 12:34 ::your belly button yeah I can see her 12:36 ::belly button 12:37 ::yeah it's got a little butterfly tattoo 12:38 ::next to it not here's because that is 12:41 ::officially out mm-hmm nonetheless that 12:43 ::woman see what it's just unto you that's 12:46 ::going to lead to a haunting so Zak is 12:49 ::like I'm out there and I'm like I don't 12:50 ::believe in him and now so he should they 12:53 ::should go into these places and pretend 12:55 ::like they don't exist yeah because they 12:57 ::actually went into a place called 12:58 ::Bobby's Bobby Bobby Mackey's Bobby 13:01 ::Mackey's yeah Bobby it was his old 13:03 ::country singer mm-hm and he ran this 13:05 ::place and I will say this it was a muddy 13:07 ::coated environment I've ever seen one of 13:09 ::these Shoshana yeah that's what they 13:10 ::said it was pretty it seemed like it was 13:12 ::pretty alike as they were sitting there 13:14 ::there was an interviewing an old man and 13:16 ::that's a part of it too is like they're 13:17 ::all so old drunk country musicians 13:19 ::they're all just like they're sitting 13:20 ::there talking he's like we're waiting 13:22 ::we're saying looking silhouette of a 13:25 ::Mayan just walked across the back room 13:28 ::and he goes adventurer guys like oh my 13:29 ::god we've got a ghost in the gut in 13:31 ::premises I've got to see for myself get 13:36 ::the therm owned get the thermogram and 13:38 ::the progressed like pans around they're 13:40 ::like oh my god it's burning up and it's 13:41 ::just his hair because it's all gelled up 13:44 ::gel to animate miss if one of those 13:46 ::light bulbs pop and there's a spark in 13:48 ::the room he's gonna look like Michael 13:49 ::Jackson shooting a Pepsi commercial 13:51 ::the difference between that what that 13:53 ::show is is that they don't have a camera 13:57 ::crew let's do like we know the camera 13:58 ::crews each one of them has its know each 14:00 ::one of them has a camcorder and they 14:02 ::stay in the place overnight and they 14:04 ::recorded but that also went into in the 14:06 ::end of them just being like come out 14:08 ::ghost and she's like always the guys 14:10 ::like wait a second let me handle this 14:12 ::well evidently is in their friend ghost 14:14 ::I know that you feel that you're human 14:16 ::but I have to release you you aren't 14:19 ::alive anymore ghost you're but you don't 14:22 ::have a body you can be released from 14:24 ::this way and they're all like said 14:25 ::everyone's like talking it's like well I 14:27 ::can't believe he's talking to the ghost 14:28 ::that dudes fucking crazy he's just 14:29 ::talking to a ghost and it's like he's 14:31 ::fucking Stu it's not real it's not real 14:34 ::real and it's like this this show is 14:36 ::apparently known as the angry ghost 14:37 ::hunting show the guy wears all black and 14:39 ::and that the person that interviewed the 14:42 ::main haunty of this situation other than 14:44 ::Bobby the fellow who owns the place his 14:47 ::wife was that really pushed down the 14:48 ::stairs by a ghost that 14:50 ::like this fellow who killed a woman in 14:51 ::there yeah and this is a thing the story 14:53 ::is these two hooligans killed a woman 14:55 ::took her head off her body walked into 14:59 ::the place dumped her head into a well 15:01 ::that that is on the premise a drain off 15:05 ::ditch for the slaughterhouse okay there 15:08 ::was water houses so that was actually 15:10 ::what's really cool about the place is 15:11 ::that so visit this part so this murder 15:14 ::is real the murder is real the murders 15:15 ::real they say it's all it just you know 15:18 ::with just a classic again it your you 15:20 ::know in terms of flaws of a ghost 15:22 ::hunting show well I do think the the the 15:26 ::the initial interview with the one guy 15:28 ::who at ha it was haunted the most he 15:30 ::lived apparently he lived in the 15:31 ::apartment above the bar for six years so 15:34 ::you know he's not doing well and 15:36 ::drinking moonshine every night Oh 15:37 ::evidently it got to the point where they 15:40 ::called an exorcist and he woke up after 15:43 ::a six hour eight hour exorcism choking 15:45 ::the priest who's like Irish don't 15:47 ::remember nothing and it's like you were 15:48 ::just Lulu how do you mind yeah he was 15:51 ::absolutely I mean have you guys ever 15:52 ::tried have you guys ever drank moonshine 15:54 ::well I mean like I mean I'm talking like 15:57 ::actual I'm talking actual country-ass 16:00 ::like corn Distilled moonshine okay it is 16:03 ::the most insane shit you've ever had in 16:06 ::your life this doesn't surprise me at 16:09 ::all but so that was the story of that 16:11 ::guy which it all seems amazingly spooky 16:13 ::in the room don't you think initially 16:14 ::Henry and I repose was like well this is 16:16 ::a pretty damn good scare and it gets 16:19 ::back into the ghost adventure or yelling 16:20 ::at the ghost and be like show yourself 16:23 ::to me and it's like why would the ghost 16:25 ::respect you a ghost is better than you 16:27 ::and it showed itself to you when you 16:29 ::weren't paying any attention to it 16:30 ::chill the fuck out and be nice to the 16:32 ::ghost exactly for a glass of wine for 16:34 ::the damn thing and they said that's what 16:36 ::they said uh um what was that 16:38 ::oh that's paranormal stay we'll get to 16:39 ::that in a second stupid all these ghosts 16:42 ::love the bar for some reason hey look he 16:44 ::always loved B or something like that 16:45 ::that happens here I'm sending so but he 16:47 ::loves beer you know the UH the the thing 16:51 ::about ghosting hunting shows is again 16:55 ::so let's say like the problem of 16:58 ::Schrodinger's cat right and they're 17:00 ::talking about a whatever observed 17:02 ::universe yeah it's a forget 17:06 ::Schrodinger's cat alright so there is a 17:09 ::cat in the box and the cat exists and 17:13 ::doesn't exist all at the same time 17:14 ::because it's if there is a radioactive 17:16 ::isotope in the box yes that will kill 17:19 ::the cat and so it's like inside this box 17:21 ::you look at its box 17:22 ::yeah like there's the cat is both alive 17:24 ::and dead inside this box and you won't 17:26 ::know until you open it up but until it 17:28 ::because it's unobserved any any like any 17:32 ::every outcome as possible yeah because 17:34 ::you're not like choosing something yeah 17:36 ::but if you show you don't observe it 17:38 ::then the cat is both alive and dead all 17:40 ::the same all the same time there is 17:43 ::showing now that reality is different 17:47 ::when you observe it well I mean I - 17:49 ::that's the rule of a of documentaries is 17:52 ::that you automatically change I mean 17:55 ::this is a rule of science actually is 17:57 ::that you change your you know your 18:01 ::subject just by observing just by paying 18:03 ::budget to it yeah so you're putting if 18:06 ::gose exists and they are a psychic 18:08 ::phenomenon and that they are either 18:10 ::intelligent hauntings as they were 18:11 ::saying in ghost lab intelligent 18:13 ::hauntings which involve a ghost being 18:15 ::able to interact with a person who calls 18:16 ::its name like hey touch my titty and the 18:19 ::ghost touches titty and then there's 18:20 ::also unintelligent ghosts which is just 18:22 ::when they pick up something on Ghost 18:24 ::Adventures they picked up a ghost saying 18:26 ::I don't like dogs and I don't like fish 18:28 ::you know I don't like I don't like fish 18:30 ::I like birds 18:30 ::yeah that's what it is oh this is a stew 18:33 ::note better oh you're serious I thought 18:35 ::you were making jokes true Wow 18:37 ::though this was actually ghost lab going 18:38 ::back to that douchey show right there 18:40 ::like oh he's so threw off the case that 18:42 ::they were like bullets on intelligence 18:43 ::so we can't deal with it because they 18:45 ::caught a snippet of conversation which 18:48 ::was a man's voice they showed the 18:50 ::recording of a man's voice going I don't 18:51 ::wanna talk about only fish I mean it's 18:53 ::like if you have to do something into 18:56 ::subtitles and the person is speaking 18:58 ::English either you're filming some mud 19:00 ::people in Pennsylvania or you're making 19:02 ::it up making it up 19:04 ::making it I'm sorry if I see the human 19:07 ::being playing a drum and be like hey 19:08 ::everyone no I don't know and that means 19:10 ::hey I don't go to Walmart I'm like 19:12 ::alright having those release me 19:13 ::yeah just like write that and read that 19:15 ::the thing is is I just refuse to believe 19:19 ::that you will see a ghost if you go 19:22 ::looking for one well this is something 19:24 ::we've talked about many times on the 19:26 ::show yeah is that you know if you go 19:28 ::looking for word goes it's you know it's 19:30 ::like whenever you really like a girl 19:31 ::always but it's like whenever you really 19:34 ::like a girl whenever you really try for 19:36 ::it and you really go for it the girls 19:37 ::never going to go for it 19:39 ::but whatever you don't pay attention to 19:40 ::or whenever you're very nonchalant about 19:42 ::it that's whenever the girl comes same 19:45 ::thing with ghosts it's tough to sit if 19:46 ::you tell the ghost that you love him 19:48 ::like her her on the back of your senior 19:50 ::picture at the end of senior year come 19:52 ::to me it works out it's like um did that 19:55 ::work out for you no it did not in my 19:57 ::situation what are you talking about it 19:58 ::didn't work no she is married in Indiana 20:01 ::she's got a lot of tattoos now though so 20:03 ::vibrant so can't be with a tattooed 20:05 ::broad you can't be no I don't know why I 20:08 ::bother 20:11 ::don't like at things like a turn-on if 20:13 ::you gotta go no tattoos or tattoos I'm 20:15 ::just gonna go no tattoos that's fine 20:16 ::sure yeah no I don't know who cares yeah 20:19 ::the next show we watch was Paranormal 20:21 ::State which is by and by and large the 20:25 ::dumbest one as far as Paranormal State 20:28 ::the one that is actually like they come 20:31 ::from a college yes this is that 20:33 ::paranormal State is the only ghost 20:35 ::hunter show that I've seen okay the this 20:38 ::show are so stupid it I watched one 20:42 ::episode I'm like I'm never watching that 20:44 ::they are 19 years old they are they are 20:47 ::students of a fake science all right 20:51 ::like Northwestern State or something 20:52 ::like the Penn State right like I mean 20:54 ::it's an accredited university yes did 20:56 ::you know ego's Penn State this is the 20:58 ::exact same thing as majoring in theater 21:00 ::it's what is your normal activities 21:03 ::studies it's like what job are you gonna 21:04 ::get after this when I was a little kid 21:06 ::and I was obsessed with um the food ooh 21:09 ::like going on Queens at the time and I 21:12 ::was like super obsessed with monsters 21:14 ::and witchcraft I would write letters to 21:16 ::the Paris 21:17 ::psychology department at Duke University 21:19 ::like long things about like I'm really 21:22 ::interested in paranormal I want to be it 21:24 ::like I want to do this and like asking 21:26 ::questions about witches said monsters 21:28 ::and stuff like that and they would never 21:29 ::get back to me I mean I mean really what 21:32 ::we'd want to encourage you know entirely 21:34 ::your professor with the bogus fucking 21:37 ::profession 21:38 ::you should probably respond to anybody 21:40 ::who buys it you know what we're talking 21:41 ::about here we're talking about Peter 21:43 ::Venkman class yes like that's Manxman 21:45 ::Peter Venkman from Ghostbusters oh yeah 21:48 ::those are you fucking every ghost bust I 21:50 ::don't tell me I don't want to go 21:51 ::yourself it's not economical other jokes 21:53 ::are not funny they are serious matters 21:56 ::that should not be jested about same 21:58 ::reason I've never seen him up a woman 21:59 ::ever you need us I would give you a 22:02 ::squirrel I've ever seen what's that one 22:04 ::Jesus movie that the most acting the 22:07 ::oppression of the Christ's passion the 22:08 ::crisis ever yeah no it's hard to watch 22:10 ::ghost movies Turner watch movies about 22:11 ::fake dumb shit Jesus Christ I do it 22:21 ::again the all time do it again give it 22:23 ::to me I bought a book today called the 22:25 ::origin of the devil that's that is 22:28 ::actually very true to come from would 22:31 ::you get that Housing Works who not I 22:33 ::have ever done words yeah absolutely 22:35 ::um let's get the Paranormal State 22:36 ::alright I Paranormal State it's a bunch 22:38 ::of 19-year olds the doing shit that's 22:40 ::fake they put their big there's it's 22:43 ::like all these kids are just like well 22:45 ::you know we'll ghosts are very important 22:47 ::and it's that weird thing of like 22:48 ::whenever the cameras and these people 22:49 ::they look like they're about to laugh 22:51 ::yeah I know it's like it's hard to 22:52 ::explain but they're all just sitting 22:53 ::there like just kind of like all excited 22:55 ::about being on television and then um 22:57 ::they decided to it's four of them and 23:00 ::then they have a trainee mm-hmm whose 23:02 ::name is like Calista and she's like I 23:05 ::don't know Sam I mean touch I'm gonna be 23:08 ::in charge of the guest investigation at 23:10 ::all right and then like doing these 23:13 ::interviews with people about this 23:14 ::haunted bar she's like seven you 23:16 ::fantastic aspect happening and they're 23:18 ::all just like old drugs are just like 23:20 ::ghosts been around 23:21 ::as did all the time go solo when 23:24 ::connected to be a ghost love me I know 23:27 ::it's like in your dumb chasm and they're 23:29 ::all just like thank for your questions 23:31 ::thanks feeling nice it's your answer and 23:33 ::the leader we're coming to be like no 23:35 ::Kara Kara was really thorough no 23:37 ::questions but there's a couple of things 23:38 ::you know what guys gotta bring a 23:39 ::recorder gotta bring a record a review 23:42 ::owner's name he's the founder of the 23:44 ::Paranormal Research Society at Penn 23:46 ::State University Hague wasted time 23:49 ::normals Nick that's why it's called 23:51 ::paranormal State is that is he the like 23:54 ::chubby like faggoty dude with the 23:56 ::glasses no which one was that that 23:59 ::that's on paranormal state he might have 24:01 ::been told she might wear our junior he 24:03 ::graduated or not just was like he was an 24:05 ::older guy he was in like his mid-30s oh 24:07 ::no no this is different 24:08 ::I think you saw an older episode I guess 24:11 ::so yeah um because there was the guy he 24:13 ::was one of those guys that like he walks 24:15 ::into the room and he just sort of stares 24:17 ::out into the distance I've seen ghosts I 24:20 ::can feel it I can feel him in the room 24:23 ::no and I hear something I feel something 24:25 ::can you feel it can you hear it 24:27 ::they just do all these ineffectual 24:29 ::shitty tests that are obviously mocked 24:31 ::up for television and they're awful it's 24:33 ::like they were like the big thing about 24:35 ::this haunted bar is that wineglasses 24:37 ::used to just fly off the thing a fella 24:39 ::named Charlie haunted who evidently 24:41 ::loved beer so it's like Charlie loves 24:43 ::beer and the owners will be like you 24:46 ::know I only have three wine glasses and 24:48 ::I don't buy no more because they just 24:49 ::keep on disappearing Charlie been 24:51 ::knocking up my lies to me people were 24:53 ::stealing a but it's like it's a bar wine 24:54 ::glasses are the most sensitive of all 24:56 ::glasses that's our as usually starts 24:58 ::breaking German mugs nobody that's a 25:00 ::real as soon as he appears in front of 25:02 ::you and pulls down your pants and starts 25:05 ::going 25:07 ::then you know he's real they getting the 25:09 ::glows a ghost blowjob would get just 25:12 ::like in ghost Ghostbuster which Dan 25:16 ::Aykroyd got a ghost blowjob I cut that 25:18 ::old story line another movie though I've 25:20 ::seen the thymine it had that one scene 25:22 ::man there was a whole storyline of him 25:25 ::going to this old forts really putting 25:27 ::on and then finding the costume of that 25:30 ::old general and putting it on and like 25:32 ::like kind of like dancing around 25:34 ::something and falling asleep on it now 25:35 ::is it ghost of his wife holy shit and 25:38 ::interesting I did not know that you 25:40 ::wouldn't know though well nobody knew 25:41 ::because it wasn't in the film I would 25:43 ::say that they gotta get those paranormal 25:46 ::stay people out there don't let those 25:47 ::ghost hunters know how to really hunt 25:48 ::go-sees fucking assholes 25:50 ::do this experiment so the experiment is 25:53 ::they use poor talcum powder down on the 25:55 ::tables and they put the wine glasses on 25:58 ::the 61 glasses on very rickety small 26:01 ::tables they come back at in the morning 26:04 ::and they're like oh my god and they see 26:08 ::that the wine glass was one of them has 26:11 ::slightly shifted right and they're just 26:14 ::like this can't be done this can't like 26:16 ::be done by not touching this table and 26:17 ::they're like Calista come not just table 26:19 ::unless the closer like water they put 26:20 ::back in the rest and she just goes like 26:23 ::uh and they all like try to like nudge 26:26 ::the table they're always like nudging 26:28 ::there there's no way there's no way on 26:30 ::one of these would move it's so stupid 26:31 ::it's just so it's such a fucking junkie 26:34 ::waste of time I love like and I would 26:37 ::say yeah they are they're the worst they 26:40 ::are definitely the worst I would say the 26:42 ::best though is one that we didn't watch 26:43 ::today is the ghost hunters that was the 26:45 ::original one to to come out of all the 26:48 ::one with the with the the front mounted 26:51 ::cameras front mounted cameras they do 26:54 ::the whole thing with the taps and they 26:55 ::they give the evidence to the person at 26:57 ::the end of the show yeah you know for 27:00 ::the most part they need to get they get 27:01 ::cool stuff it's all shadows and and make 27:04 ::believe and those terribly bizarre sound 27:06 ::waves that they get that don't actually 27:08 ::exist are they they look they are the 27:11 ::nicest as well to the ghosts on my 27:13 ::opinion are these the guys that like 27:15 ::mostly go for like mental hospitals and 27:17 ::they go like place yeah 27:19 ::which we are going to go to one very 27:21 ::very soon yes we will goddamnit I want 27:23 ::to go too and the other thing to 27:24 ::definitely want to go to Montclair New 27:26 ::Jersey laughs man all right but so the 27:29 ::Mothman that's all man I've been 27:32 ::obsessed with the Mothman since I was 27:33 ::like 13 years old well yeah it's for the 27:35 ::mother the Mothman whenever I was a kid 27:37 ::I had a book of like urban legends yeah 27:40 ::there was an illustration of the Mothman 27:42 ::that was one of the most terrifying I'm 27:45 ::pretty sure I had a same exact book I 27:47 ::think some of that illustration of the 27:49 ::Mothma the famous one right yeah let's 27:50 ::on 'fl this is a question we want to put 27:53 ::to our viewing audience if you let 27:56 ::listening or listening I mean zombies 27:59 ::editage to edit it all right so ah this 28:01 ::is a question for you guys um are we 28:04 ::real or are we go sir you listening to 28:06 ::this right now are we goes uh if you 28:09 ::have a haunting you would like us to 28:11 ::investigate let us know we will do the 28:14 ::real deal haunting we're the only ones 28:15 ::you could get rid of this ghost and 28:17 ::we're not going to bring cameras in 28:18 ::there now I mean we're gonna we're going 28:20 ::to bring some cameras and remember 28:21 ::hammers we're going to be respectful to 28:23 ::the goats and if you live in the New 28:24 ::York area Long Island Staten Island 28:27 ::please hit us up anywhere anywhere that 28:30 ::we can get to on a train from Brooklyn 28:33 ::if you have anything like this email me 28:36 ::at Marcus dot J dot parks at gmail.com 28:41 ::do it email let go and we're gonna try 28:44 ::to do it the ghost will the bus goes for 28:47 ::you we will stop you're going once again 28:49 ::Henry we got to go in there with respect 28:51 ::and we might not find any goat we're 28:53 ::gonna fucking go in there we're gonna 28:54 ::kick these ghosts in their fucking nut 28:57 ::sounds like goats lab right now right 29:00 ::now smell my grab a coat so I'm pushing 29:02 ::down a better one I can already sat in 29:04 ::rows I mean that's like Henry shut up 29:06 ::Henry 29:08 ::now this is the kind of piece we need to 29:11 ::find a ghost 29:12 ::wait a second did you hear that hear 29:14 ::that what the look back at a pervert oh 29:16 ::wow wow wow wow you girl 29:18 ::I think it's thing we've to end the 29:19 ::fucking episode god damnit ghost yah yah 29:23 ::yah yah yah at least one usable yah yah 29:28 ::yah yah yah got the end you guys super 29:33 ::room from yank now honey we want to know 29:36 ::what goes on but send us your 29:37 ::information we're going to go out there 29:38 ::and we're going to do it and we want to 29:39 ::interview you and it's gonna be a great 29:41 ::time so I'll write for Marcus Parks 29:43 ::Henry Zebrowski hey guys oh this has 29:47 ::been last podcast on the left we're 29:48 ::gonna talk to you real soon and excited 29:49 ::to get your feedback 29:50 ::yeah me gusta lations megusta lations I 29:53 ::forgot what it went after me gusta 29:56 ::lingsha do you not having her 29:57 ::catchphrase anymore I which one I don't 29:59 ::you had one I am looking forward to it 30:03 ::Oh Magoo still a consolation for you as 30:06 ::well your emails though or a cave comedy 30:09 ::radio you can just email that calm right 30:11 ::now you just email Marcus J dot parks 30:14 ::Gmail okay we're gonna find in cure 30:16 ::ghosts dot J dot parks doc I'm with the 30:18 ::parks with a K parks with a K Marcus 30:20 ::with a C okay with a Jake day with a Jay 30:24 ::that's all so confusing J stands for 30:26 ::Jordan oh my god well they're never 30:30 ::gonna be able to reach us now so it's 30:33 ::good episode though mark AJ Marquez 30:36 ::jangly parks Marcus jingling Marcus 30:39 ::taught junior you didn't hear our Castle 30:41 ::Jewish marks juggling ugly I'm jungle 30:45 ::parks goodbye